Wednesday, May 4, 2011

Setting the tone


As moms we have the power to set the tone in our homes. Will it be a happy cheerful place, or one filled with strife? Will we use self-control in stressful difficult times, or will we lose our self-control and become a liability to our husbands/families causing more grief? Will we trust that God will lead us and guide us, knowing that he will take care of the big things and little things? These are things I've been working on for a long time (aren't we all?), and will have plenty of practice at in the coming months!
In the coming months we've got some big things happening. My husband is working on his PhD, it has been a fairly easy process up until recent months, and is shaping up to be a very busy stressful time for him. He needs to be done in August so that he can graduate in September. Baby #7 is due mid-August! If those two things were not enough, we are moving from California to Arizona at the end of September! Yikes! When I think about all that we have to do and all that will be happening at that time it would be so easy for me to become stressed, anxious, and set that tone for my family and home too. Instead when those feelings start coming up I'm doing my best to take a deep breath, pray, remember who is in charge here, and take things one step at a time.

There are plenty of things I can do to prepare for this time. In order to keep track of the things I need to do to have our home prepared for a new baby and a move I've made up a binder to list these things in, and a plan of action. There are so many things to do, but split up month by month one thing at a time, it does not look so bad.

Trusting God in all of this is the big one for me. When it comes to the months of August and September there are just so many unknowns. When will my husband finish his work? Will he be extra busy when the baby is born? What will this baby's temperament be, will he sleep? How will my recovery go? How will I keep up with the needs of our family and recover from childbirth while being a helper to my husband? When will we get orders (DH is military, we can't make any arrangements for our move until we get orders), and how will the move go? These are all things I just can't do anything about. Yes, I can prepare, but when it comes down to it they are all out of my control. I must trust God in these things, that He will provide for and protect us. By doing what I can now and being prepared it will be that much easier to deal with these unknowns. My husband likes this verse and I think it is a good one for me/our family right now. We will prepare for this "battle" but victory belongs to God!

"The horse is prepared for the day of battle, but victory belongs to the LORD." Proverbs 21:31

I'm also trying to be realistic in my hopes and expectations for this time. There are plenty of things we would love to do in July/August/September, but we're realizing we have to say "no" to many of those things. I'll also have to know when its time to put away those fun sewing/craft projects and just get to them later. I'm even scheduling some "fun" to make sure we enjoy this time!

These are not lessons that just apply to a move, childbirth or some other big life event. These are lessons for everyday life. Lessons to apply in the big things and the little things. The way I deal with life, stress, and the unknown set the tone for my family. I want to be a blessing to my family, to strive to be that Proverbs 31 woman, and teach my daughters to be as well!
*I'm also linking to Raising Homemakers


  1. Yes! I am amazed at how true this is! I (the wife and mother of the house) truly do set the tone for the household. The "if mother ain't happy, nobody's happy" joke applies! It really does! It's shocking, humbling and convicting that we ladies really do have this power.

  2. I love the picture of you and all of the kids hanging out on the couch! So adorable :)

  3. It's so easy to get burdened down with the 'nexts' in our lives but some of those 'nexts' never even happen or God just moves in and takes care of it with ease. It is so easy to get stressed over life and you start snapping at everyone before you are even aware of it. You do have a lot on your plate, but no doubt God will help you! I loved this post.

  4. Hi! I saw your post linked up on A Wise Woman. I really identify with your binder and list system of keeping track of what needs to happen when. I live by that! I pray everything will go well and that you will have times to enjoy along the way. It sounds like you and your family will be just fine with two parents at the head who trust in God.

  5. Just stumbled across your blog. I too am expecting, we are due the first week of August. My hubby is currently deployed, so I understand your concerns of the unknown. Know that you have an armywife in upstate New York praying for you, your family and your soon to be bundle of joy!
    God bless...